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In the late afternoon hours of July 22nd an Order vs Chaos skirmish broke out near Papua in the Capture the Flag arena. One witness's description of it follows:
"Dude, this Order guy rolls in like he was Suge Knight and starts dropping AFK point farmers at the Chaos flag like they were high taxes." "The last AFK farmer standing got back to his keyboard just in time to raise his hands and shout, 'Don't Loot!' before he took one last fireball to the face." "That Order guy wasn't down with any 'Hands Up, Don't Loot' nonsense and swiped the flag, their PvP tokens and was about to head back to the Order side when two new Chaos Thugs come riding in with reckless abandon" "They were hooting and hollering like two Jhelomite jihadis celebrating the Fall of Jhel and started indiscriminately letting loose with volley after volley of arrows with no disregard for anyone's well being or safety, to include any innocent onlookers." "I saw them take down that Order guy a couple of times but the violence of that pales in comparison to the heinous atrocities they visited upon his corpse" "They literally cut his body into pieces taking the head and throwing it into their packs like it was some kind of trophy" "Watching that I was just like, 'Damn...Chaos be crazy yo!'"
Well there you have it. The once docile and peaceful fishing village is in unrest following yesterday's brutal violence. Some suggest blame lies with Lord Cantabrigian British and his unwillingness to dispatch the Royal Britannian Guard to watch over Britannia's more impoverished towns and villages. Yet others insist the violence could be contained if only weapons of war like the popular repeating crossbow weren't so easily available from every corner weapons provisioner. As your humble correspondent I cannot suggest that I have the answers to such complex issues, but only that my impeccable fashion sense, symmetrical facial bones, and brilliant white smile provide me with all the modern comforts I could never attain with my intellect, ingenuity, or hard work.
Good night, and good news.